I’m so sorry I missed posting for the past few weeks. I have been creating some exciting developments and posted them in another place.
But I love that you come here to be inspired and reflect.
I want you to thrive and I’m grateful to earn a part of your attention.
When I was a teenager, I loved going into the City. Brisbane City in Queensland, Australia was my city. It’s small as far as cities go, but in my imagination, it was as glamorous as New York or Milan or Paris. Built by a river, the city lights reflected off the water at night. In the day, it was a bustling CBD. I dreamed of working in those offices, buying things from the expensive boutique stores and sharing after-work drinks by the river with delighted colleagues.
My best friend, though, she saw it differently.
“Let’s play a game,” she said one day. We had just caught the bus into the city. She lived in the country and hardly ever travelled to the city.
“What game?” I asked.
She giggled. “It’s called Random Compliments. You have to give someone a compliment and it has to be truely genuine and something that will make their day.”
Yep, that’s the kind of best friend I have. She doesn’t realise how special this kind of thoughtful generosity is. Without her, I think, I may have ended up significantly more self-centred and disappointed with my life. Still, I wasn’t sure how to play this game.
“I’ll show you,” she said.
She scanned the crowd of busy workers, shoppers and city dwellers in the mall. “Excuse me,” she said, interrupting a middle aged woman on the street. “I just love your dress. It looks so good on you, really lights you up. Where did you get it?”
The woman was stunned and delighted. She thanked Nikita for the compliment and shared where she had bought the dress. Nikita wished her a lovely day and we carried on with our game: to uplift strangers in the city.
That day, I was struck by Nikita’s generosity but also her bravery. She was completely uninhibited in approaching strangers. She had a gift to give and she was going to give it.
I learned that day not to hold back a compliment. If it’s genuine and thoughtful then let them share it.
Sometimes, it’s easier to see the good in others than in ourselves. As we walk down the street, the beautiful dresses, lovely smiles and hair styles might jump out at us. Meanwhile, inside, we’re judging ourselves for wearing this old thing and not putting on makeup. We’re comparing, sizing up, evaluating and we’re not easy on ourselves, generally speaking.
So then, it’s good practice to champion another. But we mustn’t forget to champion ourselves.
Thanks to this game of Nikita’s, I learned a deeper level of empathy and compassion for the human experience. Today, I am bravely owning the fact that I am wonderful at thoughtful, observant compliments and this skill greatly helps me in times when I feel awkward socially.
Who can you bravely champion today? Don’t hold it back, share it: it’s a gift.
And don’t forget yourself. Give yourself a pat on the back for something you love about yourself. Are you brave enough to take this to the next level? Try this game:
When you’re next in the shower, let the steam fog up the glass. Then, use your finger to write or draw 3 things you love about yourself on the glass. This is a great way to be relaxed and receptive to the message and really soak it in.
Be Brave and Curious,